Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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