my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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