So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
