You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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