the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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