WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It's never too late to be topless.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
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