Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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