just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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