He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
