I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
The best revenge is premature balding
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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