My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
