I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
