But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
sarcasm needs its own font
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
