I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
