Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
nut hugger
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
We're too hungover to prance.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
