school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
