his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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