dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
