she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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