can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
