Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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