so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
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I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
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Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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