yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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