My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
