Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize