me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
