I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
