Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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