We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
