I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
