Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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