I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
