I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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