there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
