hotel room ftw
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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