He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
