it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
