Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
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I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
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I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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