Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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