What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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