whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
