Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize