There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
