Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize