hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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