u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
