My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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