I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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