please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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