He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
