Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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